What Have I Become

Quit tastes delicious in the beginning.

Beginning, after the start.
After the first step was committed to.
After the first beat of the heart.

Quit is a cocktail dress staring across the room.
Quit is a toast from the dark eyed stranger.
Quit says: "We need to catch up."
Quit says "Don't leave me so soon."

Quit asks to fill in your name tag.
Hello, my name is ______
Quit inserts itself here.
Here, and in what you hear.

Nine months ago I was zipped open.
Nine months ago my life faced it's biggest test.
Nine months ago Quit reached out to say hi.
Nine months ago they sawed open my chest.

Quit bought out the billboards.
Quit plastered up noise mixed with fear.
Quit offered appetizers of questions.
Quit offered to be there.
Quit was always willing to lend an ear.

Nine months ago I was zipped open.
Nine months ago I faced life's test.
Nine months ago I dug into hope.
Nine months ago I woke up living hashtag blessed.

Quit visited with opinions
As I lay in that hospital bed.
Quit visited after hours
Quit would replay the notes of what everyone said.

Quit would ride shotgun.
Quit would see how I behaved.
Quit wrote with lipstick on my mirror.
Quit used all the one-liners it had saved.

Nine months ago I was carved open.
Nine months ago I almost died.
Nine months ago.. my weakest..
Nine months ago.
Nine months ago.
What am I made of?
What have I become?
Who am I.. inside.

With those questions came whispers
Answers. Vivid. Difficult but worth it.
Beautiful in their struggle contained.
Crystal clear.
Hope flowed from my foundation.
Quit only had a cheap plastic veneer.

Hope repaired and restored.
Hope renewed and reassured.
Quit only kept repeating itself.
Broken record.
Quit only repeated itself.
Quit ... it's only a word.

What have I become
Is now "What will I be?"
With hope I'll keep going.

Stay tuned.. we shall see.